Family, and showing respect: 형, 누나, -(으)세요, 계세요

Grandparents and parents

할아버지 is grandfather, 할머니 grandmother, and 부모님 parents. You already know 아버지 and 어머니.

우리 가족은 네 명이에요 — there are four people in my family. Remember 우리: with family, Korean says “our” where English says “my”, so it is 우리 가족, 우리 어머니, 우리 할머니, even when you are the only child.

Older brother, older sister: it depends who is speaking

English has one word for a brother. Korean asks two questions first: is he older than you, and are you a man or a woman?

A man calls his older brother 형 and his older sister 누나. A woman calls her older brother 오빠, a word you have met, and her older sister 언니. So 저는 형이 있어요 can only be a man speaking, and 저는 언니가 있어요 only a woman.

Younger siblings, children, husband and wife

For younger ones it no longer matters who is speaking. Take 동생 and put 남, male, or 여, female, in front: 남동생 younger brother, 여동생 younger sister.

Your own household: 아들 son, 딸 daughter, 남편 husband, 아내 wife. People are counted with 명: 아들이 한 명 있어요 — I have one son.

Talking about someone you respect

About a friend: 친구는 학생이에요. About your mother: 우리 어머니는 선생님이세요. About your father: 우리 아버지는 의사세요.

When the person you are talking about is older or deserves respect, 이에요 becomes 이세요 and 예요 becomes 세요. The choice is the one you know: 이세요 after a final consonant, 세요 after a vowel. Nothing else in the sentence changes. English has nothing like this in its verbs; in Korean it is expected with parents, grandparents, teachers and strangers older than you.

The same respect on a verb: -(으)세요

To a friend: 어디 가요? To your grandmother: 할머니, 어디 가세요? About a friend: 책을 읽어요. About the teacher: 선생님은 책을 읽으세요. Stem + 세요 after a vowel, 으세요 after a final consonant.

You know this ending. In the last unit 앉으세요 told someone politely to sit. It is one and the same form: said as an instruction it asks, said about a respected person or as a question to them it simply describes, with respect. The situation tells you which.

Three verbs are replaced

For three everyday verbs the respectful form is a different word. 있어요, for where a person is, becomes 계세요: 할아버지는 방에 계세요. 먹어요 becomes 드세요, which covers drinking too: 할머니는 차를 드세요. 자요 becomes 주무세요: 할아버지는 지금 주무세요.

You have been saying 계세요 since your first lesson: 안녕히 계세요 is “stay in peace”.

계세요 is only about where a person is. It does not replace 있어요 in the sense of “have”.

Never about yourself

할머니, 어디 가세요? — Grandma, where are you going? 병원에 가요 — I’m going to the hospital.

The question honours the grandmother. Her answer is about herself, so it is plain 가요. Respectful forms raise the other person; using them for yourself sounds absurd. Whenever someone asks you 어디 가세요?, you answer with 가요.

Two questions to recognise

성함이 어떻게 되세요? asks for someone’s name, and 연세가 어떻게 되세요? for their age. 성함 is a respectful word for 이름, and 연세 for 나이. Learn both questions whole; there is no need to take them apart.

You will be asked the first at hotels, clinics and counters. Answer about yourself plainly, with the ordinary word: 제 이름은 민수예요.